Time Off for Good Behavior?

When it comes to movies, Tina and I have an agreement that we alternate his and hers movies. One weekend its horror, action or sci-fi for me, the next its mush and sap for her. Unfortunately, through no doing of mine--although definitely to my benefit--the summer blockbuster season does not offer a lot of sap and mush.
Almost every summer weekend we were at the theater watching movies like Forgetting Sarah Marshall, Iron Man, Indiana Jones 4, Hancock, Hellboy 2, The Incredible Hulk, X-Files 2, The Dark Knight, The Strangers, and more. As we left the theater each week with our ears ringing from the sounds of thunderous explosions or our hair standing in terror, I got a warning.
“You owe me, big time,” she would say.
This past weekend she began collecting. On Sunday we went to see The Women, with Meg Ryan, Jada Pinkett-Smith, Annette Benning, Debra Messing, Candace Bergin, Cloris Leachman and Bette Midler. What is that you say? No men’s names there? Must have only been small, tertiary roles, right? WRONG! There were no men in the movie, at all. Not even a background extra.
Don’t get me wrong, the movie wasn’t a two hour man bashing fest as I had suspected. After all, it was about a wife who learns that her husband has been cheating and then leans on her eclectic collection of friends for support. Honestly, it wasn’t bad. It had some seriously funny moments. Pinkett-Smith made the movie, in my opinion. The hospital scene at the end where Messing was giving birth was laugh out loud funny.
But it did have the obligatory male stereotypes. Pinkett-Smith’s character, a lesbian, reminds her cast mates that dating women doesn’t come with a phobia of asking for directions, the desire to channel surf or an arsenal of offensive bodily functions. Haven’t we heard all that before? Some of us heathens are cultured you know. I eat my sushi with chopsticks.
I leaned over on numerous occasions and told Tina that this movie should count as three of her turns. She didn’t go for that. Our next movie will probably be either Nick and Nora’s Infinite Playlist, which looks very good although I am concerned that Michael Cera is going to be forever cast as the smart but shy quirky kid (see Juno and Superbad), or A Flash of Genius with Greg Kinnear.
Whatever we end up seeing, I’m likely to spend the next few weeks to months cursing the movie Gods for not sprinkling some chick flicks throughout the summer movie season. Because they don’t, rather than going a weekend here and there without bombs, body bags and boobs, Tina has been released for time served and I’m on parole with chick flicks as my community service.